I had an experience this morning that inspired me to write this post. A very lovely girl walked up to the entrance of the coffee shop at the same time as I did. Trying to avoid the inevitably awkward "who goes first?" move, I quickly rushed ahead and held the door open for her. She gave me a beautiful, beaming smile and thanked me as I followed her inside. (What can I say, my mom taught me right). Inside the coffee shop, however, her beautiful, beaming smile turned into a terrifying scowl. She proceeded to berate the barista for not making her latte hot enough and refused to let it go. It got to the point that several people had to tell the girl to calm down, which only seemed to set her off more.
While my judgment of her could be completely based off of one bad day and she could very much be the lovely girl I initially assumed, her fate as a villain was sealed in my book at that moment. Almost immediately she inspired me to consider characters that appear harmless on first appearance that ultimately turn out to be menaces. What can I say, my mind rambles.
5. Lots-O'-Huggin' Bear,
Toy Story 3
Lost in all the men-crying-in-the-theater nostalgia of this movie was, frankly, how big of a bastard Lotso was in
Toy Story 3. He made that baby doll cry, nearly got Woody and the gang eviscerated by ravenous children, and almost turned the timeless Ken-and-Barbie relationship upside down. (How would I have hope for a meaningful relationship if Ken and Barbie couldn't even work it out?) His cane and grandfather-like demeanor was in stark contrast to his impending darkness. He does get some style points for his over-the-top selfishness when he refused to save the toys from the incinerator,
creating one of the most heartfelt and surprisingly dark scenes in Pixar history.
4. The Klopeks,
The 'Burbs
When you think of Tom Hanks' movie career, you inevitably think about
Forrest Gump, Cast Away, Saving Private Ryan, etc. However, the movie that I will always love most is
The 'Burbs. Check it out sometime. Fuss is made throughout the movie about the mysterious nature of Hanks and Princess Leia's next door neighbors, the Klopeks. From their reclusive nature to their ominous hole digging in the rain, the neighbors come to the conclusion that they're up to something evil. Yet when they finally meet, the Klopeks appear to be harmless (if not creepy and
socially awkward). But are they...? Or are Hanks and his friends the evil ones? (I'm assuming I'm one of about 5 people my age who have actually seen this movie, so I won't spoil the awesomeness except to say,
"Hey Pinocchio, where you going??")
3. The Convenience Store Characters,
Cabin Fever
This movie took some very interesting turns. At the beginning of the movie when the main characters were shopping in the store, the owner calmly asked the guy who stole the candy bar to return it without any problems. The old guy with the beard did seem to be incredibly racist, so the convenience store people didn't get off crystal clean. Then,
this incredibly over-the-top-yet-tastefully-and-credibly-crafted-scene happened, and all hell broke loose. The unassuming clerk went crazy and hunted the teens,
Most Dangerous Game-style. The only redeeming factor at the end of the movie for the convenience store was that the old man with the beard appeared to be slightly less racist than we first thought...
2. Alex and his gang,
A Clockwork Orange
Alex and his gang don't look like much in the above picture, what with their
Quailman-inspired outer-underwear. However, within the first thirty minutes there are several inexplicable beatings, rapings, and spiked-milk chuggings...things that Quailman never would have stood for. What's also surprising is Alex's stark contrast between his gang and his family. To the gang, he was their leader with an affection for crime and Beethoven; his family, just a young teen who faked sick one-too-many times. Even the government attempting to cure Alex via brainwashing couldn't stop his inner demons and proved once and for all that dystopian teens are doomed.
1. Brad Wesley,
Road House
Brad Wesley's motives were one of the many unreasonable storylines in what has become my favorite movie of all-time. An incredibly rich man living in a lawless town who decides it's in his best financial interest to steal from the many blue-collar citizens who inhabit it. Wesley loved power...but not as much as he loved the unrealistically beautiful women of Jasper or hiring his hilarious henchmen. His docile demeanor throughout most of the movie only exacerbates the plot. Why does such a seemingly gentle man have so much hatrid for everyone in town? And where are all the police officers while his henchmen run twenty-foot tires through car dealerships and explode barns and mechanic shops? Brad Wesley don't care, he do what he wants. He's relentless.
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PB
